Posted by: carolyn / through a widow's eyes | October 28, 2014

it is to laugh

October, 2014. I spent last Saturday “Healing Through Writing”,  in an intense creative writing workshop, and then its aftermath. Whew!  Serious travail in that room. Some deep places were reached, and I think some of the participants had not been to these places before. It is healing, but also exhausting.

We worked through 6 or 7 writing prompts, which was interesting to say the least. Some of the prompts were easier to approach than others. Here is one draft I came away with. I was surprised at the shape it took. The prompt was “If I could have you back for one hour”. Ugh. Horrible. They weren’t all so brutal. (One person asked for a different prompt instead of this one, and I don’t blame her, coming up on only one year out.)

This isn’t finished, but it’s started.  Ani diFranco refers to a “zygote of a song” that she plays in one of her live shows.  This is kind of like that. It made me laugh, in a Not Very Nice way, so, in the spirit of suddenly laughing, here:


If I could have you back again
I’d tell you all I’ve learned since then
Or would I ask you where you’ve been
And what it’s like there.

If I could have you back again
I wouldn’t want it.
Knowing you’d have to go again
It isn’t worth it.

If I could have you back again
Would you even know me?
I’ve changed so very much since then
God damn it, babe, you owe me.


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